Maybe this is a little premature. Halloween is still over a month and a half away, but that shouldn't stop anyone from becoming overly excited for horror film season. I've been so busy with my freelance work that I've had no time to catch up on the abundance of trailers released for these possibly disgustingly terrifying gems. So join me as I watch each trailer and give my completely biased prediction on the overall product.
The Possession (Aug. 31st)
Alright, this is one I already knew about due to the horror legend Sam Raimi's (Evil Dead, Drag Me to Hell) involvement. I'm not too excited about it because it doesn't stand out from the pack. Does the line "Based on a True Story" still affect movie goers? It looks very mainstream and I just can't get behind the story. I'll most likely be passing.
[REC] 3: Genesis (Sept. 7th)
Ya gotta go with the red band trailer, baby. I haven't seen any of the previous installments so I'm going into this one completely dry and unaware of what the hell is going on. I assume a wedding attacked by zombies? Some of which is caught on tape? I can dig it. Plus a bride running with a chainsaw is always a great selling point.
Resident Evil: Retribution (Sept. 14th)
Do these films even classify as horror anymore? I always saw them in more of an action/thriller light. But I was frightened by the video games growing up so I have no choice but to include it. I haven't seen the 3rd or 4th installments of the Resident Evil franchise so I might need a bit of catching up to do before I turn this one on... speaking of turning on... hello Milla Jovovich (yeah I went there).
Bait 3D (Sept. 14th)
Turns out sharks have been waiting for one good tsunami so that they can finally launch a surprise terrorist attack on our unsuspecting nation. Exquisite cheap fun in my book. I wouldn't watch this expecting a highly tuned story or a great suspenseful ending. I'm only here for sharks ripping up everything in sight... especially tiny toy dogs. Terrible staight-to-DVD goodness.
House at the End of the Street (Sept. 21st)
Uh-oh, this trailer starts with a PG-13 rating. It's already off to a bad start. There is nothing here that really encourages me to see it. I'm not really sure if the film goes backwards due to the scenes in reverse or if it's just an editing tactic for the trailer. It does have potential though. I'd wait until reading a few reviews before heading into the theaters for this one.
The Hole (Sept. 28th)
How can I say anything bad about Joe Dante? He's the director of one of my childhood favorites: Gremlins. Well, this film premiered back in 2009 so I was a little hesitant to add it but since it will have a limited release in the United State this month, I have to include it. I've heard some good things despite the strange pace of the trailer. Feels more like a horror film for kids, but that's not necessarily a negative thing.
Hold Your Breath (Oct. 5th)
I really cannot tell if this is a purposely crappy, campy movie or a serious attempt at horror. If it's going for crappy and campy, I'm all for it. Otherwise, I have absolutely no interest.
Sinister (Oct. 5th)
This. Looks. Great. Films based around home movies are all the rage right now so you can't blame this film for going down a similar route. But I love how the home movies are just a key element within an actual film instead of relying on the "found footage" to become the film. This one is definitely on my to-watch-list.
V/H/S (Oct. 5th)
I stumbled upon this trailer about 2 months ago and I've been excited ever since. We're not going to be able to escape the "found footage" sub-genre of horror so we might as well learn to live with it. This film has potential to take it to a new level. You can already watch it online, but I'll be waiting for the theater treatment.
Smiley (Oct. 11th)
This one has been creating some buzz online. I mean, look at that disgusting dude's face. Sadly, it's only a mask. But what's more terrifying than being pursued by a psychotic killer who's sadistically smiling the entire time he's chasing you? I've had many nightmares that follow this synopsis. Gives me goosebumps. (Speaking of Goosebumps, where's my Goosebumps: The Movie?!)
Grave Encounters 2 (Oct. 12th)
This one flew underneath my radar until I did a little bit of research for this post. I love the first one. If you're an Eddie B!og devotee, then you might remember me praising that film a year ago. Sadly, this one is going down the easy-to-screw-up Scooby Doo route (Let's investigate it, gang!), but I'll still be looking forward to the finished product.
ABC's of Death (Oct. 19th)
This is beyond cool. I really wish I could have somehow participated with the upbringing of this anthology. This doesn't really serve as a film but instead as a collection of current horror enthusiasts. I expect a really elaborate film with stories that range from frantically funny to downright disturbing.
Paranormal Activity 4 (Oct. 19th)
Yeah, I assume you've heard of this one. A lot of horror fanatics hate what these films have done to the genre but I for one would much rather see a Paranormal Activity film than another Ringu (The Ring) ripoff. I don't find that style scary nor do I find it worth my time. The Paranormal Activity films are great for a quick scare. The pace always leaves you uneasy and waiting for the next bump despite the fact that these films stick to the same exact formula. I'll see it.
Citadel (Oct. 26th)
It looks unique so it has my attention. I've always been the type of guy who hates the use of children as the antagonist in horror films. I just don't find children scary (unless someone tells me I'm about the become a father). BUT ... feral children?! That's something I don't mess around with.
Silent Hill: Revelation (Oct. 26th)
What's with horror films based on video games using the prefix "Re-" in their titles? Does "Re-" make a movie cooler? Anyways, I'm not impressed. Hopefully all this 3D mumbo jumbo can help the film actually make a profit. I've seen some clips from the first film but wasn't interested enough to watch it the whole way through. I played the original game a long time ago but these films look nothing like it. But this one has a chance to be a sleeper.
Did I miss any films? If so, please let me know so I can check them out. I'm always looking for my new favorite horror film so keep me posted with any diamonds you might find. Also, stay tuned because in October I'll be giving my updated "Best Horror Films on Netflix", which I'm very excited for. If you're interested, here's the list from 2011: Top 10 Horror Films on Netflix.
Tis the season to be scary.
TODAY'S TASTY TRACK
Mumford & Sons "I Will Wait"
So I'll be bold
As well as strong
And use my head alongside my heart
So take my flesh
And fix my eyes
That tethered mind free from the lies
Yup, the kid's still busy. But luckily I've found a little time on the side to write a post about a topic that randomly forced itself into my head. In a nation dominated by technological advances, we've become accustomed to looking over some little things that could possibly make our lives much easier. Due to the convenience of cell phones and the internet, we occasionally lose one of our most important skills as a human race: The skill of analyzing. Unless we're told to really analyze something, we don't even bother. We just whip out our pretty phones to occupy that empty gap that use to be taken by constructive thinking. That's what brings me here. Here are 5 "little things" that you should have known a long time ago and will never be unseen:
5) What Side Is My Damn Gas Tank On?
You pull up into a gas station ready to throw down the rest of your savings account just so you can drive to the Taco Bell one town over (you tell yourself you're getting something off the new Cantina menu, but we all know you're grabbing something cheesy, beefy, and with Doritos/Fritos in it) when all of a sudden you realize that you can't remember (or never had a clue) what side your gas tank is on. You pull into an open slot and suddenly have to waste additional time by exiting the vehicle to take a look.
This scenario always plays out with your tank on the opposite side of your vehicle. You swear to yourself in front of a 3 year old dyslexic child (why dyslexia, I don't know), pull a 3 point turn to reverse the direction of yourself, some Masshole pulls into your spot, and of course your day is officially ruined. Well guess what? There's a way to avoid this hassle. There's actually a little arrow on most cars right next to the gas gauge that points in the direction of your car's gas tank. Yup, and you're realizing this now. You're welcome.
4) Arrow Symbolism
Speaking of stupid, little arrows: See that space between the "E" and "x" in the FedEx logo? Yup, that's an arrow. This is why I love advertising. Because you get to manipulate people without them even knowing it. Beautiful use of subliminal messaging so that you know your love-package for a long distance butt buddy is moving efficiently from destination A to destination B. And since we're on the topic of moving between letters, go check out the Amazon.com logo:
Notice the arrow going from the letter "A" to "Z" that resembles a smile? That is also a intelligent way to let you know that they have "everything from A to Z" ... Clever girl.
3) Easy Way to Remember "Pi"
Want to see some magic? Write "PI.E" on a piece of paper. Hold said piece of paper in mirror. Say abracadabra like a big dummy. Presto, the rounded transcendental number 3.14 appears. Too bad you got that question wrong on a test back in middle school when all you had to do was type "PIE" in your calculator. But you were too busy punching in "5318008", flipping it upside-down, and showing it to your nearby friends. Uh-huh-huh-huh-huh.
2) Ketchup Cups: You're Doing it Wrong
This one right here makes me question everything I've ever known in life. An item that I've used so many times in my 23 years, 2 months, & 18 days of existence has never been used correctly. I'm talking about those dang ketchup cups. They're evil SOB's aren't they? Perfect for fry dippage, but inefficient for lazy hamburger soaking and those unique chicken nuggets with elephantiasis. Turns out we had a way to resolve this problem right in front of us:
If you pull on those little ridges, the cup's top expands and your friends instantly proclaim you the smartest man on the planet (unless you're eating by yourself... then you just pat yourself on the back and finish off your Quarter Pounder with a side of 20 McNuggs like the efficient machine that you are). Have you ever in your life seen any fat sack of grease do this? Is this a sick, selfish joke made by the inventor? Why did nobody tell us?!
1) Willy Wonka Girl Gets Bonked
How many times have you seen "Willy Wonka & The Chocolate Factory"? Too many times to count. Classic film I know, but have you ever seen this little girl get rocked in the face by the creepy candy man while he's singing his little song about how awesome he is to the unsuspecting children?:
The broad gets socked. And she takes it like a champ by sucking it up just so she can fulfill her sugar addiction and not fall to the back of the candy line behind Jimmy and Sally. She didn't even get a golden ticket for the bulbous bruise materializing underneath her chin that could manipulate the future growth patterns of her face .... Alright, I'm taking it a step too far, but you get the picture.
TODAY'S TASTY TRACK Dawes "When My Time Comes"
And now it seems like the unraveling has started too soon,
Now I'm sleeping in hallways and I'm drinking perfume
And I'm speaking to mirrors and I'm howling at moons
While the worst and the worst that it gets.
And the most successful and busy month of my young career comes to an end. I just went through a 3 week period traveling New England jumping show to show. For an individual based in Portland, ME working freelance, that's a triumph. This area is no where near as hungry for film & TV opportunities as NY/LA, so you really have to market yourself to get these jobs. But the worst part is, I was getting so many calls that I actually had to say no to a few of them. Some pilot for Bravo and a reschedule for A&E's "Hoarders" were tossed to friends of mine due to this hectic and varying schedule.
But let's quickly run through my small voyage. Things started picking up at the end of June right here in Portland when I joined a crew I previously worked with for an upcoming Food Network special. Then July hit and I jumped on with the Travel Channel's "Food Paradise" series as they explored some of the best restaurants in New England. I jumped between Southern Maine, Boston, Cape Cod, and Rhode Island as I worked with a small crew and got to try some of the most amazing food I've ever had.
I wrapped with that awesome crew just to merge with another professional crew working on Leftfield Pictures' "Bid & Destroy" around southern New Hampshire. If you're one of the 3 1/2 individuals who read my blog regularly, you might remember this as that National Geographic Channel shoot from the creators of Pawn Stars that was going to take up 2+ months of my life. I ended up saying no to it but luckily they needed some extra help so I was able to get in there and gain the experience.
Of course, there was minimal downtime. I shot right back up to Portland, ME to work camera on the first episode of Casa Club TV & Canal Ella's "La Chispa de Chef Carmen Gonzalez". It was a reality television show that followed Top Chef participant Carmen Gonzalez as she ran her new restaurant in Portland, ME and explored her life. It was a primarily Spanish speaking set so it was definitely an interesting experience. But once the local crew became use to the style of the crew imported from Miami, FL, it became an extremely beneficial learning experience.
Every time I'm forced to adapt to a new production crew, I leave with a better mindset. There's so many different styles of crews, which makes it a lot of fun to work with individuals from all over the globe and to adjust your own methods to fit theirs.
And now I'm here. Back at my day job and finishing up this blog. Yet still I'm always looking for that next opportunity. Especially anything with travel. But for now I'm going to fit some music back into my life. I have the Mumford & Sons' "Gentlemen of the Road" festival coming up, which has the potential to be the highlight of my already stacked summer. And since I'm still fresh from a 311 & Slightly Stoopid concert I went to this past Sunday, I'm going to leave you with this...
TODAY'S TASTY TRACK Slightly Stoopid "2am"
4 in the mornin, police knockin' at my door, what for?
Bet I know the reasons he comin' back and
And then they comin through, I tell them "He just kicked down my door"
Even though I'm on the floor with a gun to my head
So my blog's starting to boom, which has given me some motivation. My previous "high score" for monthly visitors to Eddie B!og was 461 back in September 2011 when I went through a quantity-over-quality phase and wrote 12 lackluster posts in one month. Then during the month of June, somehow the views just about doubled with 896 reads despite writing less. Now, we're not even through a third of July and that June record is going to be surpassed today.
Hip hip hooray
Even though I have no intentions of being a professional writer, I've developed a lot of ways to express myself and keep my mind fed. I've always chose to convert positive as well as negative energy into the creation of writings, poetry, videos, and music to better myself. I found this technique to be an excellent form of natural self-medication without diving into the unhealthy habits that surround us and affect our mental health daily.
I don't smoke, fill myself with caffeine, have any prescriptions, or get drunk when I'm low or stressed. I just get creative. Even if what's produced isn't "good stuff", it's turning negative energy into positive.
Only recently have I started using these creative works to market myself for work and life. I spent many wasted years filling a laptop with personal content that I could have used to gain relative followers. Instead I hid it out of shame and the constant thought of "what would people think of me?"
Then I grew up. I gained goals, expectations, and a new kind of self-drive that kind of pushed away these unnecessary worry's that were blocking the big picture. An easy way to put it: I replaced my social drive with a drive for success by shifting focus from self-image to self-happiness. And just like that, some other pieces in my life started to fall into place.
So you're interested in learning how to do the same for yourself? Well you have to start the same way an addict gets hooked on heroin (there's my expected terrible example of the day). You have to develop the habit out of curiosity. When you're having a bad day, just open up a word document, close your eyes, and start typing. Don't hold back, just let it flow from your mind. Don't even think about grammar mistakes and everything school has taught you, just let your thoughts become words and let it go all over the place. Worrying about the little things is what got you here in the first place, remember?
Step 2: Repeat. Slowly you'll find your likes and dislikes with the process and you'll find other outlets to express yourself and your point of view. I guarantee you'll learn a whole lot about yourself that you wouldn't have come across otherwise.
And voila. You didn't even have to piss off a friend by filling their head with an unnecessary rant about how some boy didn't give you attention today while you were at the gym.
Wonka break.
But that doesn't mean you should cap your emotions and become an individual who can express themselves as an introvert but not as an extrovert. This whole exercise should push you away from that mindset in the long run. It's all about getting comfort.
One redundant tip I can give you is to stay open. Be happy with who you are and watch others jump on the bandwagon. I know you've heard the phrase "Be Yourself!" a million times ever since that first fateful day you packed your backpack for preschool, but I really want you to think about it. Sit for a second and ask yourself one question: How many people actually know the true me?
Kinda scary right? How many "you's" have you developed in order to please all the different people within your world? I guarantee most of these persona's you've created have actually turned off a lot of people you've run into. Come on, how many times have you yourself showcased your natural ability to detect fake? We all have. And I, like most people, am completely detracted by fake.
I hope I've been able to get you interested in what's worked for me over the years. And if I haven't, well at least I got you thinking positive... Or negative if you completely disagree with everything I've said ... The important thing is you're thinking. Well I've never been good at ending these write-ups... Anyways... How 'bout them Olympics? ...
TODAY'S TASTY TRACK Muse "Survival"
And I’ll light the fuse
And I’ll never lose
And I choose to survive
Whatever it takes
Well I might as well keep it going with my most popular blog series to date: The Best of Netflix. It's also my only "blog series" to date... but whatever.
As we all know by now, I love the Netflix. I haven't paid for cable in over a year despite the fact that I've worked on a handful of shows that appear on it. For some reason, I feel more motivated to watch the hidden gems that are picked by some sort of higher power for $7.99 a month.
And within these hidden gems are plenty of TV comedies that will tickle your funny bone. And yes, I apologize for using "tickle your funny bone". But let's just cut to the chase...
First a disclaimer: This list will be biased towards my weird sense of humor. So sorry in advance:
The Top 10 Comedy Shows on Netflix:
10. The Whitest Kids U' Know - Season 5
An acquired taste, but once it's acquired, you can't turn away. Some of the sketches miss their mark, but most are hilarious and can really draw the viewer in with the ridiculousness of the material. Exhibit A:
9. Reno 911! - Season 1-6
Speaking of acquired tastes,
this one is another. I never fell in love with the show, but its got
that drawing power that sucks you in without you even knowing. The
characters are great but some could have used a little more work. Still
worth watching.
8. That 70's Show - Season 1-8
The seasons have their ups and downs, and whenever a character leaves, we're left with a giant hole in the comedy, but the show still holds up. How That 70's Show not be special when just about every main character has gone on to have very successful careers?
7. How I Met Your Mother - Season 1-6
This is the type of show where you have to pick your poison. Some characters are awesome and over-the-top (Barney), while others are lame yet awkwardly familiar (Ted). Plus you can learn a lot from watching HIMYM:
6. Blue Mountain State - Season 1-3
You know what sucks? When you get really invested into a show right after it gets canned. That's what happened here for me. The show is hilarious and so over-the-top that its hard not to like. Plus the main cast really brings it. Especially "Thad".
5. Trailer Park Boys - Season 1-7
Most Americans have their own interesting opinions on our Canadian friends up north, but this show will completely reverse any stereotype your mind has adapted. The story is so simple: Sell weed and figure out a way to get rich in a trailer park.Yet it's way more than that. Plus, there's Ricky:
4. Workaholics - Season 1
Oooh I LIKE thaat! After just the first episode, I fell in love with every individual who had a role with producing this show. My one problem is that only the 1st season is available while the 3rd season is playing on Comedy Central right now. I had to walk to my local Bull Moose and pick up the 2nd season before I fell too far behind. Still totally worth it.
3. Louie - Season 1-2
The best written show of the bunch. Louis CK is the George Carlin of this age, and I say that as a huge fan of Carlin's work. Smart humor with plenty of stupidity to keep people like me happy. Plus, this show actually makes you think every once in a while... but who wants to think?
2. The League - Season 1-2
FX is killing it. 2 of my top 3 shows are on the network, and if I had my way, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia and Wilfred would be on Netflix as well. But to explain this selection, let me say one thing... Shiva Kamini Soma Kandarkram!
1. Chappelle's Show - Season 1-3
Did you expect any other show to be in this spot? There has never been a man that has spit more annoyingly quotable lines from his mouth in a 3 year span than Dave Chappelle. Hell, I could have made this list just about my personal favorite quotes (which actually might have to happen). I think everyone would agree with me when I say this show was legendary.
And there you have it. Another reason for TV fanatics to hate me. But hey, I'm only human and can't watch everything Netflix has to offer. So here's another 10 shows that I tried but didn't watch enough to really get into:
Parks and Recreation Arrested Development Peep Show The IT Crowd Spaced 30 Rock The Office My Name is Earl Malcolm in the Middle The Hard Times of RJ Berger
Happy watching people.
9/13/12 UPDATE
Immediately after writing this post, I became hardcore invested into Arrested Development, which makes me think this list needs an update. Whitest Kids U Know should be dropped and I'd place Arrested Development up at number 2 just because it's the best written comedy series on Netflix PERIOD. I seriously can't wait for the upcoming renewal as well as a future movie.
- Eddie
TODAY'S TASTY TRACK Zion I & The Grouch "Leader"
They say there's too many
cooks in the kitchen.
Well I rather be one of
them than some of chicken.
Let me summarize freelance filmmaking in one word...
Unpredictable.
Yup, that will do it. Because it feels as if every time I start putting my fingers to the keyboard for another rant about how work has become dryer than a cat's tongue (yeah I went there), things pick up faster than ever before.
Alright, so let's bring everyone up to speed. It all started with a downer. I got a recommendation for that George H.W. Bush HBO documentary being shot in Kennebunkport but we couldn't make it happen. That was a big letdown because that sounded like such a great experience. Who wouldn't want to kick it with Barbara and the gang? Even though I'm sure it was nothing like I expected.
Would have been a grand ol' time.
Then while I'm kicking rocks around in personal anguish, I get a call from a production company coming to Portland for a Food Network show. I spend 75% of my day thinking about what I'm going to eat... so of course I said yes. By the way, the other 25% is spent actually eating.
Then like 2 days after that, I get an even more exciting call. Turns out A&E's Hoarders is coming to Manchester, NH and could use some help the following weekend. That was a big HELL yes.
A dream come true?
I would have been completely content right there. But then today I get an e-mail from a production company coming to Portland for the Cooking Channel. And the best part is that everything actually fits into my schedule. Does that ever happen???
Oh, and remember that blog post about the Best Documentaries on Netflix? I actually received an e-mail from the producer of an award winning documentary called The Way We Get By. It was shot in Bangor, ME and focuses on a group of senior citizens who greet U.S. troops going through the Bangor International Airport. She recommended her movie after reviewing the list. So I clicked on the Netflix and gave it a watch... and of course she was COMPLETELY right. Such a touching documentary that without a doubt deserves a spot on that list. She told me about her next project and how she could use some help but it's way up near the Canadian border so the logistics aren't looking good. But either way I wish her crew the best of luck.
So yeah, looks like I'm about to get real busy again. I love it.
Despite the hectic schedule, I'm definitely going to have to make some time for a Fourth of July celebraish. And by "celebraish" I mean call up a bunch of hooligans, fill a cooler with the first stereotypical 30 rack of beer I see that has the colors red, white, & blue on it, grab a chair (preferably a recliner with optional footrest), find a body of water to place said chair and/or optional footrest, and watch things explode into magical pixie dust. Perfect way to recoup during a period like this. If I don't accomplish this plan, then the "terrorists" have won.
Not on my watch.
TODAY'S TASTY TRACK Spoon "The Way We Get By"
We go out in stormy weather
We rarely practice discern
We make love to some weird sin
We seek out the taciturn
And that's the way we get by
Remember that short period of time when I wanted to move to Florida? Well, then someone in Miami had to go and get their face eaten off by a drugged up lunatic (bath as-salt?). And of course I had to make the mistake of looking at the picture... uggggggh. There's a day ruiner right there. By the way, according to auto-correct, "ruiner" isn't a word. Well I'm a certified Ruiner of Words so that can't hold me back.
Anyways, I thought it would be nice to throw down a little rant on the blog since I've basically vanished from it. I feel as if every month I've tried to set a goal for blog posts but I never reach it due to the fact I'd rather be doing... well... anything else. Living close to Downtown Portland in the summer really increases my motivation to step outside. But lucky (or unlucky) for you, it's currently raining so I'm actually stuck at a desk editing video and in need of gaining my mind back. So let's begin:
The topic on my mind right now is restraints. And no, I'm not just talking about the Webster Dictionary restraints that I have to deal with on a daily basis. I'm talking about some of the ridiculous laws that our politicians are lobbying for. And the worst part is, they're SUCCEEDING.
OH NO! It's going to be one of those blogs...
Yeah my apologies but I'm going there. This rant slowly manifested itself when I found out yesterday that residents in Middleborough, MA have voted to create a $20 fine for swearing in public.
Fucking really?
My apologies, because I wrote before that I'm personally trying to swear less in this blog, but the town of Middleborough should realize what makes a word bad in the first place. A word becomes a "bad" word when we place restraints on it. By restricting a curse word, we are only increasing the imaginary power behind it. Words aren't created to be bad. Words are man-made and are dictated by the way we choose to use them.
When something is restricted, it's aura grows. When people can't have something, the power behind that something skyrockets.
Skyrockets in flight. Afternoon delight!
Whether it's something physical or mental.
Exhibit A: Drugs. Exhibit B: Porn for Minors. Exhibit C: Underage drinking. Exhibit D: Hot cheerleaders.
It's just human nature people. We want what we can't have. It's why you're currently working instead of rolling around in the mud. Because you want money to buy things you can't have right now. You can have a good ol' mud roll whenever you want (terrible example, I know).
Alright let's recap the travel we've completed before we move forward. So far we've already gone from Miami, Florida to Middleborough, Massachusetts. Now we head a bit south to New York City. If you haven't heard, Mayor Bloomberg is on the verge of banning large sugar-filled drinks at restaurants and other locations.
I personally don't drink a lot of the drinks that will be affected, but dammit, if people want a soda that's contents are equivalent to 50 packages of sugar then let them get a soda that's contents are equivalent to 50 packages of sugar. The individuals making these rules for us are basically saying "Hey, you're not smart enough to make your own decisions so I'm going to make them for you. Plus, I'm sick of looking at your tummy jiggles every time I see you at the local Starbucks." Ridiculous. By the way, my apologies if I've offended anyone that has to deal with "tummy jiggles" on a daily basis. It's a serious disorder, people.
But Bloomberg's health panel isn't done yet. They're also looking to limit the size of that delicious, buttery popcorn you pick-up every time you return to the theater for the latest Twilight midnight premiere. And milk could be the next target.
I hate to sound like a can of Pabst Blue Ribbon, but what happened to freedom? What happened to doing things because they made us happy in the moment? Sure, it's going to hurt us in the long run, but some politicians are acting like we're so stupid we don't realize that. Plus, how come I can still go into the local NY bodega and pick up 40 oz. of St. Ide's non-high gravity malt liquor heaven with a side of Twinkie's wrapped in Slim Jims but I can't have a 20 oz. Slurpee?
Let's get our priorities straight people. Amurikah.
TODAY'S TASTY TRACK
Jack White "Sixteen Saltines"
Spike heels make a hole in a lifeboat,
Driftin' away when I'm talking and laughing as we float,
I hear a whistle, that's how I know she's home,
Lipstick, eyelash, broke mirror, broken home,
